Waiting...and waiting...and more waiting. Did I mention waiting?

I think this is day 73 or something. 

So I am sure you are wondering what in the world we are waiting for. Well as mentioned in former posts, Papa will be moving up to a new hospital in Murray, UT. It is the IMED Hospital, and he'll be on the rehab floor. He has been deemed as not "sick" just needing to rehabilitate physically. (thank you for your prayers!! WOO!) 

So yeah, the team from IMED came and did an assessment and Papa passed with flying colors. Funny story actually, he was trying to sweet talk his way in as well. He was all,"I am a happy guy who can make other people happy. If you want a guy who can help energize the other patients and get them moving, I am him!" (that is probably what sold them) (obviously)

So today is moving day. Or at least it should be, but like I said, we are just waiting....waiting....waiting. And waiting. And just to spice things up we are waiting a little bit more.

But Papa is in good spirits, he is watching some weird animal show on the Discovery Channel (as usual) and trying to sneak those coveted ice chips. We love this guy. I have loved our Daddy/Daughter date for the day. :) 

Hey that's a fun memory for me to share! (since I have the time) So out of us 4 kids, there are three girls. Jamiin, myself, and Kelsey. As a rule, when us girls turned sixteen my Dad had to be our first date. (I say HAD to be but what I really mean is we had the privilege of having him as our first date) I remember when I turned 16 I was awfully nervous to go on a "date" in general, but Papa assured me that he would take good care of me.

We went and got dinner, burgers of course, then we went to see a movie and then he took me to buy my first diamond. I will always remember that time with my Dad. I am so grateful that he was my first date ever, and I look forward to more Daddy/Daughter dates in the future. :) 

Yeah so there ya go. I will update you when we finally blow this Popsicle stand. 

With love,

The Baers (Well, Aubs) 

God bless us everyone!

We just wanted to share a small Christmas miracle with you. Tonight some dear family friends brought Christmas dinner to us at the hospital, which in and of itself was a great miracle for us. The best part, however, was that the team at the hospital made it possible for Papa to join us at the table. They hooked him up to a couple tanks of oxygen, got him into a "cardio-chair" and wheeled him down to eat with us. 

It was miraculous. Thank you for your prayers, they helped make yet another miracle. 

We love you, Merry Christmas! 

The Baers


The Nativity Bible Video

My best Friend...

Merry [almost] Christmas everyone! I could literally just BURST with excitement...mostly because I get to talk to my amazing sister in Italy. Random fact: Dec. 14, 2013 marked 2 years since I last saw Kelsey. Needless to say I miss my other ginger half more than anything in the whole wide world. 

My last post was about my feelings on CHRISTmas, and how I was looking forward to celebrating the birth of a dear Friend. I have thought a bit about that, about how Christ is a Friend of mine. I have pondered on how I know Him and how I have come to know Him as I do. You see, Jesus Christ's life is one that is full of so many different experiences. He experienced joy, peace, love, pain, wonder, and even fear. A scripture in the Book of Mormon offers a passage of that allows us to understand the path that this Man walked. 

" 7 And lo, he shall ^asuffer ^btemptations, and pain of body, ^chunger, thirst, and fatigue, even more than man can ^dsuffer, except it be unto death" 

And:

4 Surely he has ^aborne our ^bgriefs, and carried our sorrows; yet we did esteem him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted.

5 But he was ^awounded for our ^btransgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities; the chastisement of our peace was upon him; and with his stripes we are ^chealed.

Each experience that He passed through, associated Him with the human feelings that WE experience as we pass through different circumstances. He felt these things first, so that when it comes time for US to pass through them, He is there to guide us. Personally, as I have passed through heartache, pain, fear, joy and peace, I have become acquainted with the Savior in a very real way. I have come to know Him better. He has become a true Friend, who I know is there for me, Someone who knows perfectly how I feel, even when know one else does. 

A couple of days ago I had the privilege to go and visit the beautiful Christmas lights up at Temple Square. At the end of our visit, we decided to visit the Christus, a large statue of Christ with His arms outstretched. This has always been a favorite place of mine, and the whole night I was anxiously anticipating seeing the statue. As we made our way to the Christus, I felt like I was going to see an old friend...like for reals. The pull I felt to get up to the statue was greater than I have ever experienced. I felt like I was coming home after a long trip. 

We found a place to sit down, and began to take in the grandeur of the scene. As I looked up at Christ, everything just felt so familiar, and I felt so much love. I wish I had more eloquence to portray how I felt, but words just don't suffice. All I can say is that Jesus Christ really is our Savior, He is our Redeemer, and He is our Friend. I love Him dearly. 

Yeah so Merry Christmas Everyone! Thanks for letting me share. I will let ya in on a few exciting developments with Papa too. So basically we have a family tradition of opening one present on Christmas Eve. We are religious about this, my Dad being the primary enforcer. This year is no different. Papa gets a brand spankin new little gift tomorrow, a PEG tube. I know right? Lucky guy. Now we can take that annoying tube out of his nose! Woooo party!!!! He also gets a new home here in a few days up at the IMED Hospital in Murray. We aren't sure which day he'll be moving, but we will keep y'all posted! 

Thanks for being so spectacular!

xoxoxoxoxoxoxo,

The Baers

Take it with a grain of salt...

That is how I feel about the information the doctors give, and I mean that in the best way. It seems as if they give us the worst possible news, and the very next day my Dad does something to not only negate the diagnosis of the previous day, but he leaves everyone with their jaws dropped, scratching their heads.

Literally, it has been that way from day 1, and we know pretty well by now that this pattern will continue. This past week we received some saddening news about his condition, and the very next day probably one of the biggest miracles we have yet witnessed happened, so whatevs. It's totes cool. (I cannot believe I just used the word "totes". Forgive me)

Papa is still getting through being sick, and doing his best to keep in good spirits. Dev and Britt are geniuses and brought him a small basketball and a large laundry hamper so he can shoot some hoops. Some amazing ward members brought a little Christmas cheer through the most amazing BYU Christmas tree ever. Aaaaand the best present ever will be coming in 6 days. We get to talk to Sorella Baer! 

I hope all of you are happy and having a wonderful start to your holiday season. Please be safe as you travel! We love you!

Love,

The Baers

Well why not?

Tomorrow is Christmas, it's practically here! Well, no, not really, but who can refuse a good Grinch quote?

So I'm like REALLY into the holidays this year. But not in the conventional "deck myself out in red and green" or "buy everything flavored in peppermint" sort of way. No, I've been really into the SENTIMENTAL parts of Christmas...and I warn you, I am a bit passionate. (uh oh...HERE WE GO!)

I have seen a lot of things on TV, on the Internet and who knows where else, all trying to take the word "Christ" out of the word "Christmas". This baffles me. And no, I am not just being a naive young woman who can't hold her tongue...there is actually some substance to this. I totally get the "politically correct" reasons why people are pushing to take out Christ's name, but from a moral standpoint I just don't get it! So often, we hear people asking why our country, or our world is suffering from such drastic moral decay. They question how this is happening and how we can reverse it.

Well, to me, the answer is quite plain and simple. We can be more Christlike. It doesn't matter if you believe that He was the Savior of the world or not, this Man was a good Man. He lived an exemplary life of service, charity and love. He showed what it meant to love your neighbor. He is acquainted with unrequited forgiveness, and with pure compassion. When we think on the stories of Jesus Christ, we think of the hope that He brought to people's lives...and yet....we wish to take His name out of the season in which all of us are striving to portray the very things for which He stands for.

My plea this holiday, for those near and far, is to read those bible stories. Whether you consider them factual or not, we can all benefit from the messages that they contain.

I would also like to share with you a very personal sentiment of mine, and I feel privileged to do so. For the past two Christmases, I had the privilege to be a full-time missionary, a witness of the Lord Jesus Christ. I received a letter officially calling me to do so. This Christmas I am no longer a full-time missionary for the Church, but I have received a call to once again, witness to the world that Jesus Christ does live and His miracles are still active and present on this earth. No one can truly know what we as a family have witnessed in the past couple of months. What I can share with you is that some of the very same, most sacred miracles that were wrought in the New Testament have happened before my eyes, and I KNOW, with every part of me, that God does exist. Jesus Christ is His Son, and our Savior.

Once again, forgive me for being so passionate, but I really have no other choice now do I? I feel honored that I have been chosen to witness to the world in such a way. I love the Lord Jesus Christ. I know Who it is that we are celebrating this season, and I couldn't be more grateful for such a dear, dear Friend.

As always I will update real quick with Papa Baer. It was a good news/bad news day. His CO2 levels have given us some issues....which stinks big time. But HALLELUJAH he has received a clean bill of health for the pneumonia! This means that we are being moved to a sterile room, room 214 now (same hospital) and that you can come visit! But only if you are healthy. And you use hand sanitizer.

Thank you for reading! We love you!
xoxoxoxxox
The Baers

No excuses...

I have no excuses for not writing. I could say lame things like "I was busy"..."I forgot..." or "The devil made me NOT do it"... either way I am a slacker and a half and I apologize.

I guess a bit of me not updating in the past few days is I didn't know how to put the updates into words just yet. It is hard ya know? One hour the doctors say one thing, the next hour it has changed. The past five days have been a little bit...or a lot a bit like that. 

BUT now we at least have some solidarity to our reports and I am able to confidently make a public update. After the CO2 scare, the docs decided to put Papa back on the vent, and he returned back to normal after a couple of days. He was crackin' his "Dad jokes" as normal, he was asking for a hamburger...and letting us know every five minutes that his trach needed to be suctioned. Nothing out of the ordinary.

Well as the docs were suctioning his trach (getting stuff out of his lungs) they started noticing that he was spiking a fever, and that the stuff in his throat was thicker than normal. They ran some tests on the stuff, and yep. Papa has pneumonia. And not just ANY pneumonia. Oh no, that wouldn't be weird enough. He has MRSA pneumonia. So our pleas for visitors of all shapes and sizes is being retracted. He is under a strict isolation environment, for your benefit and ours. This means that if you, or anyone you've been around has been even the LITTLEST bit ill, you need to stay away. But we love you anyways. Those of you who are healthy and happy, come on over, you can visit Papa and we'll give you a yellow protective gown as a souvenir.

Please pray for him! We love him dearly.

com amor,

The Baers

Photos!

Christmas in Italy....who is with me!

What are YOU doing this Christmas?

Day 50

The number fifty is a significant one. Like when someone turns the ripe old age of 50, you say that he is "over the hill". The 50th year according to Bible standard is the "Jubilation Year". So basically what I am trying to say is that I hoping that because we have done 50 days of crazy livin', we are "over the hill"....and now it is the time to be jubilant? Anyone? Anyone?

Fantastic. Today is another relaxing day. After quite the week, Papa has been re-stabilizing and resting a bit. He doesn't remember the past 5-6 days, and that is probably for the better. He has started to crack jokes again, started up a little sarcasm and his smile has returned. So we are happy. 

As Christmas draws near, it is interesting to note  that our preparations for the holidays are so significantly different than former years. We aren't making long lists for this reason or that. We aren't plotting and planning how to get that "thing" we've been wanting all year long. We aren't even clipping coupons. What we are doing is finding ways to spend even MORE time together as a family...and we are focusing on the Savior. We don't really get much of a chance to go out and see the lights, and that's ok. We are grateful for the light that we share as family when we are all together. 

This Christmas will be like none other that we've ever experienced...and the thing is. I think I like it. We are able to find the TRUE reason for the season and He makes us whole and happy.

Have a great Wednesday!

xoxoxoxox,

The Baers

P.S.
http://www.mormonchannel.org/video/mormon-messages?v=2874125972001&cid=HPWE120413186

Like a broken vessel

Day 49

It is impossible to describe just how much this experience has changed our family's lives. It doesn't matter the time spent away from the hospital, the activity used to try and distract, or the people we are with, we can't ever fully disengage. Not that we would want to. Not that we are meant to.

God chose OUR family to pass through this. He chose us to have this in our lives. He chose this to change our lives. He chose this to change us. I don't know about you, but sometimes I feel awfully inadequate to support some burdens. The other night I was in my car at a stoplight and I raised my fists toward the sky and I said,"YOU GIVE ME TOO MUCH CREDIT! I AM NOT STRONG ENOUGH!" (I feel bad for the person in the car next to me, but it is their own fault for choosing THAT stoplight at THAT particular moment)

As I reflect on the past 7 weeks, I thought about how I am doing. How WE are doing. And the truth is...we're broken. Life just can't go on normally anymore. And now, we aren't asking for it to. You see, God loves broken things. It allows for Him to enter into our lives in a more powerful and a more deeply personal way. It allows for Him to fully mend us in HIS way, and it allows Him to use us to be His witnesses. 

It doesn't make it hurt any less, but it does give us an immense amount of hope. That this is BIGGER than us and that this is beyond our control. (If this whole situation depended on us that would be way more heavy than we could bear) 

With all of these thoughts roaming around in my brain and playing on my emotions, I thought of a wonderful talk that was given in October by an Apostle of the Lord Jesus Christ. Coincidentally enough, the talk is entitled "Like a Broken Vessel" and teaches us how to find hope in difficult times. I would like to share the very last paragraph, and testimony of Elder Holland. He says:

I testify of the holy Resurrection, that unspeakable cornerstone gift in the Atonement of the Lord Jesus Christ! With the Apostle Paul, I testify that that which was sown in corruption will one day be raised in incorruption and that which was sown in weakness will ultimately be raised in power.¹¹I bear witness of that day when loved ones whom we knew to have disabilities in mortality will stand before us glorified and grand, breathtakingly perfect in body and mind. What a thrilling moment that will be! I do not know whether we will be happier for ourselves that we have witnessed such a miracle or happier for them that they are fully perfect and finally “free at last.”¹² Until that hour when Christ’s consummate gift is evident to us all, may we live by faith, hold fast to hope, and show “compassion one of another,”¹³ I pray, in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

Amen! I KNOW that Papa will be whole one day. And I am looking forward to that day.

But for TODAY Papa...is doing better than he has been for the past few days. He had been breathing on his own for over a week, which is probably the coolest thing ever, but we found out that in doing so, his body didn't get rid of the CO2 that it should have...which cause a lot of problems. Gave us quite a fright. They had to put him back on the ventilator, but that is ok! He is hanging in there, and we are grateful he is. 

Thank you for your prayers, and sorry I haven't updated for like a week. It has been a crazy few days...

We love you!

The Baers